Getting excited about someone new you’re dating is natural. But developing super strong attachments prematurely can backfire. This article shares easy mindset shifts to stay grounded if you tend to get attached too quickly when dating someone with potential.
The Key Takeaways:
- Don’t fantasize too much about the future before they’ve earned it
- Cultivate an abundance mentality instead of feeling desperate
- Match their investment level; don’t overdo it on your end early on
The first issue is living too far ahead in your imagined future with this person. It’s okay to recognize their good qualities as a partner. But take a step back if you’re already picturing holidays, meeting their family, or having kids together after just a few dates.
Ground Yourself in the Present
When you daydream about future scenarios that haven’t happened, gently remind yourself: “We’re not there yet. For now, let me appreciate the moment with this person.”
Mindfully shifting your focus to the here and now prevents intense wishful thinking from running away. You can rationally think: “This potential is exciting, but I’ll take it one step at a time before getting ahead of myself.”
Abundance Mindset, Not Scarcity
Another common trap is feeling like this may be your only romantic opportunity, so you desperately latch onto it. This scarcity mindset of ‘I can’t let this one get away!’ naturally makes you act clingy and needy.
Instead, cultivate an abundance mentality. Believe that you’ll continue meeting great people, so there’s no need to feel crazy attached to this person yet. Tell yourself, “More opportunities await if this doesn’t become something serious.”
Match Their Pace and Investment
Photo Credit – Freepik
A third helpful perspective is matching the level of effort and investment the other person puts into the budding relationship. Don’t overextend yourself being overeager while they’re keeping things light.
For example, if they’re maintaining a casual weekly date routine, someone else needs to make plans or drop hints about expectations. Breathe, relax, and say, “I’ll let this unfold at their pace for now, not mine.”
Don’t Rush the Process
By staying present-focused, abundant-minded, and matched with their tempo, you allow connections to deepen naturally and unhurriedly. This prevents you from getting so intensely invested that you start driving the other person away through neediness.
It may feel unexciting to pump the brakes on your enthusiasm and attachment. But doing so gives the healthy relationship room to breathe and develop genuine roots over time. What fun is it to smother something before it can truly blossom?
So, if you’re prone to getting too attached too quickly, remember these mindset adjustments the next time you meet someone you like. Don’t let overexcitement lead you to push them away. Relax, enjoy the moment, and let the relationship unfold at its own pace.
What are your tips for keeping your feelings in check early when dating someone new? Leave a comment below!
Photo Credit – Freepik